I’d be an alcoholic if I weren’t such a wuss

hiking, madness, anxiety, Los Angeles

June 28, 2013 • Latest, Madness • Views: 546

How do alcoholics do it? I’m a cheap date. Two drinks and I’m done. It doesn’t take much more. In the last ten days I drank while camping, I drank while settling some Catan, I drank while hanging out with a friend, and somehow I even drank while playing some Civilization after work. The only night I had more than the required four drinks to qualify it as binge drinking was during the camping trip and that was stretched out over an eight hour period. Most of those nights I didn’t sleep well though either. And most of the food was a combination of Cliff bars and bacon (autobiography title right there).

It was too much. I’d be an alcoholic if I weren’t such a wuss.

By Wednesday I was concerned that I was slipping into a depression. I hadn’t exercised. I wasn’t reading. I’d eaten shit for a good week. What was my life becoming? What happened to my goals? How come nobody loves me? Why can’t I, why can’t I, why can’t I? Oh wait, shut up. You drank a bunch of alcohol and didn’t get any sleep and didn’t exercise. What the hell did you think was going to happen?

Tom Cruise got a bunch of flack a few years back because he was ragging on our society’s dependence on depression meds when some vigorous exercise and a good diet might be all most people need. Now, Tom Cruise is most likely an asshole. Meds have their place. Exercise, a good diet and actually getting a good night’s rest are more important though.

I rested up Wednesday night and Thursday I ate a big breakfast and in the 90 degree heat of my room did a solid 40 minutes of yoga that left me so sweaty and gross that I almost retched all over my subpar fringed carpeting. I’m not lying. It was a gross stench. It wasn’t just sweat. It was a week’s worth of booze being violently torn from my bones. I felt like Wolverine when Magneto draws the adamantium off his skeleton. Okay maybe not that bad. But I did feel sort of primal yesterday. And today the depression is gone. I made a mental list of everything I wanted to do during the day (for the record: hour blog, hour Flutes, hour Riot, hour reading, hour bookstore, hour yoga, hour cleaning my room, hour filling up my jacuzzi with cold water because it’s so hot). And I’m excited for the day. That’s my favorite feeling.

Does anyone have anything that makes them feel that way? Excited for the day, primal, or something that detoxes them of their madness? I have some yogi friends who have expressed similar experiences. But hiking or camping also do it for me. Maybe it takes art? Or a show? Or maybe even drinking? Let’s hear it.

© 2013 Christopher Dart

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